Rebranding - 2 Years Ago....

Recently, I had my 2 year "surgiversary", or the anniversary of my weight loss surgery.  On December 22, 2014 I had a vertical sleeve gastrectomy, a surgery that I fully believe both changed and saved my life in so many ways. And two years ago, I spent New Year's Eve in the hospital trying to watch the Alabama playoff game before I passed out from pain medicine. Here's the story of how I got to both days.

I had tried so many different things to lose weight over the years: Weight Watchers multiple times, Slim Fast, fad diets, diet pills, low carb, low fat, no sugar. Basically, you name it, I had tried it with varying levels of success that never seemed to last too long. And yes, I sometimes even threw attempts at exercise in with my diet of the moment. I even walked a half marathon at Disney World at well over 200 lbs! But nothing worked for me. Thanks to some health issues, it was like my body fought against me at every turn. And, if I'm being honest, part of it was probably due to my unwillingness to really make the changes I needed to make. I think I just had to develop a level of maturity that said "I'm going to make the hard changes and give up some things to make myself better." And VSG was the tool I needed to help me do that.

Finally, during the spring of 2014 I started to really and prayerfully consider weight loss surgery. Several people I knew had had the surgery and I was able to watch them and see their successes. I found a wonderful doctor in Oxford, who also was my cousin's surgeon, and I got started with the lengthy process of getting approved for the surgery. I was originally supposed to have my surgery during the summer of 2014 and even did nine days of the liquid pre-surgery diet. But God had other plans and it was deferred until December. I remember being so nervous and excited as I sat in the waiting room and holding area at Baptist Memorial in Oxford. I knew my life was changing, I just wasn't aware of the full scope of those changes.

I had my surgery on the 22nd and stayed my two days in the hospital, drinking out of the little hospital cups and walking my laps around the 2nd floor. I had some of the sweetest nurses and nursing assistants while I was there and they were so encouraging! Everything went as planned and I was released to go home and spend my Christmas walking laps around my living room and progressing with my liquid diet. But things didn't exactly go as planned from there. Within a few days I was running a fever and we weren't really sure of the source. I tried liquid Tylenol, which is disgusting, and seemed to be getting a little better. But soon I was also feeling really nauseous again and couldn't drink anything without feeling sick. And I was having some stomach pains that should have already subsided. At this point, almost a week out, I should have been able to drink and shouldn't have been needing the anti-nausea medicine anymore. Thankfully, my mom trusted her "mama instincts" and got me back to Oxford to my surgeon. I spent that Monday, December 29th, going back and forth from Baptist Hospital to my doctor's office getting different tests ran and trying not to pass out from dehydration. I was blessed with an amazing surgeon who told me that day that he was not letting me go until he knew what was wrong with me. At the end of the day, through testing and CT scans, it was determined that I had a mesenteric venous thrombosis - or a blood clot in one of the main veins in my intestines. At first, I was relieved to know what was wrong with me and why I felt so sick. But then what my doctor had said set in - I had a blood clot! He quickly assured me that if I had to have a blood clot, this was the place to have one. I wasn't in danger of it breaking loose and causing problems like if it had been in my legs or lungs. The solution to this was that I would stay in the hospital for a few days, get some IV fluids to combat the dehydration, and start trying to treat my blood clot with blood thinners.

Oh, if it had really been that simple. Things kind of snow balled from there. First, I was so dehydrated from not being able to drink that it was almost impossible to get an IV going or do the blood draws necessary to check how my body was reacting to the blood thinners. I found out that the phlebotomists would look at each other and say "Not it!" when my room number came up! This led to a central line being placed in my neck to be able to keep an IV going and quickly check my blood levels. Second, all of those blood level checks were necessary because it became apparent that my body wasn't metabolizing the blood thinner correctly. My levels were all over the place and nobody was really sure why. My "few day hospital stay" turned into 18 days. That's how I spent New Year's Eve 2014 trying to watch Alabama play Ohio State in the College Football Playoff before I fell asleep from my pain medicine and anti-nausea medicine. I didn't even care that we were losing! I do remember thinking "This is not how I wanted to spend New Years!" The scary moments continued when I pulled a muscle in my chest and we thought I might have developed another blood clot, this time in my lungs. There were some very tense moments until the CT scan ruled out a clot and we surmised that I had pulled a muscle trying to sit up without relying too much on my stomach muscles that were still sensitive from the surgery and the clot.

My family and I spent the next few weeks making ourselves at home in the hospital. Mom and I set up shop with our laptops and printers so we could both try to get some work done once I was feeling a little better. Our nurses were a little surprised by that one. They said they had never seen an office set up before! We got to know our team of nurses really well and even made friends with a few that I still keep in touch with. Our friends and family visited and prayed with me. I had so many people texting and posting that they were praying for me and I was on their church's prayer list. I felt everyone of those prayers! I even had a couple of my sweet students come visit me in the hospital. Bless them, they didn't look too scared by all of my tubes and wires! Haha!

Looking back to two years ago, I know that God answered every one of those prayers and more. He healed me from the blood clot and allowed me to use my weight loss surgery as the tool I needed to change my life and my health for the better. People ask me if the surgery was worth it considering the blood clot and time in the hospital that followed. My answer is always "Yes!" Even knowing all of that, I would do it over again in a heartbeat. I have lost 110 lbs but the numbers on the scale are just the beginning. I feel so much better and am so much healthier than I was two years ago and there is so much I want to do and accomplish that is possible now. From the beginning, God's plans and his timing were evident through the whole thing. So tonight, on this New Years' Eve, I will happily watch football on the couch with my husband and look forward to another new year full of opportunities and blessings. And I will be so thankful that I am not in a hospital bed! 

Rebranding - You're Listening to What?

Hi everyone! I hope that you have enjoyed a wonderful holiday season! It has been a busy but fun time here and I have found myself spending more time in my car as we drive to all of the different places we've needed to go for Christmas shopping, errands, seeing friends, and family Christmas gatherings. I also have a regular 45 minute commute to and from work so I'm well versed in being in the car for extended periods of time.

All of this time spent on the road has led me to discovering the wonders that are podcasts! Apparently I'm late to the party on this, but better late than never. I love listening to my satellite radio and all the the different genres of music it offers, but after awhile I was getting bored. Some friends suggested a few podcasts I might like and I've been hooked ever since. My best friend recommended "Serial" and "Criminal". I'm still getting in to "Serial" but I really like "Criminal." It has interesting stories and a few episodes that were "grab your attention" cliff hangers.

Another podcast that I listen to every week is "Stuff You Missed In History Class." The two hosts are so funny and I learn something new each time I listen to an episode. For instance, George Wallace didn't start out as a rabid racist and white supremacist, at least not in his political career. That came later after he lost an election to someone backed by the KKK and he decided that was his ticket too. I also learned he basically allowed his wife to slowly die of untreated cancer. The things you learn about people! One of the cool things to come out of all of this listening and learning is that I've even gotten ideas of elements to add to some of my lesson plans from "Criminal" and "Stuff You Missed In History Class."

Recently, I have also started listening to a few episodes of "Happier with Gretchen Rubin" after I found out about her books from one of my sisters-in-law. I also checked out "Sawbones" with a husband/wife host team that talk about different medical topics. Good stuff all around!

So, what are some podcasts you enjoy listening to? I'm always on the lookout for new things, so please share!

Rebranding - Scenes in a Nail Salon

Yesterday afternoon I was indulging in a little pampering with a manicure and pedicure at a nail salon in a nearby town. I was in town for a meeting and thought I would just make a day of it. After enjoying a wonderful lunch and conversations with friends from my meeting, I headed off for my nail appointment. While there, I got to engage in one of my favorite past times - people watching. I like to see what goes on around me and I find people and their "stories" interesting.

When I first came in, there was a gaggle of young girls, probably around 8 or 9, who were there getting pedicures. I assumed from the looks of things that they were at the salon for one of their birthdays, although it was not immediately clear which one of them was the birthday girl. And that may not have been their "story", but in my mind it was a good explanation and I simply filled in from there. The girls soon left and other people filed in and took their places among the pedicure chairs and the tall chairs at the manicure bar. While waiting in the pedi chair, I noticed an older gentleman come in. This seemed a little out of place but then I heard him mention that he was bringing his wife in for an appointment and he would be back. I didn't take much notice at first and went back to enjoying my massage chair and the movie that was on the television in front of me.

Shortly, my pedicure was finished and my freshly polished toes and I were moved over to the tall bar with the gilded chairs for my manicure. During this process the elderly gentleman had returned, along with his wife. She was in a wheelchair and he maneuvered her over to a lower table that was a better height for her. She had light brown hair with a reddish tint and was wearing a tan trench coat. The man explained to the manicurist, the same one who had applied my chosen color of Chick Flick Cherry a few moments earlier, that his wife wanted the same color as the last time she was there. The wife looked hesitantly up at her husband, who quickly and gently reassured her that everything was fine and he would be right over on the bench against the wall at the front of the salon. It was then that I noticed the wife's reply was a little garbled and wondered to myself if she had suffered a stroke.

In the short time it took for this exchange to take place, my new manicurist appeared and began the process for my gel manicure. I focused my attention on him and our conversation about the preferred length of my nails, my chosen color, and the other options that a manicure entails. While my manicurist went about filing, shaping, and polishing my nails, I stole a glance over at the husband at the front of the room near the large picture window. He was elderly, with thinning grey hair, wearing a grey sweater. He had a rolled up newspaper in his hand which he had been carrying the whole time. He read the paper for a bit and took an offered glass of rose' from one of the receptionists.

There had been some anticipation and hurried readying among the staff for a large party that was to come in. Towards the end of my manicure, the party began to trickle in. It was a group of 12 college students who had booked the salon for the rest of the evening. The manager busied herself with taking care of the girls, getting each of them their special glasses of rose' with cotton candy draped on a stick across the top of the glass. The manager offered to play a movie for the girls and I believe "Legally Blonde" and some other chick flicks were suggested. "Legally Blonde" won out and the familiar theme song was soon emanating from the TV screen. I heard one of the other manicurists explaining to her customer that the girls were seniors at a local university and were each in the Honors College and were involved in some other groups together. They wanted to celebrate the end of the semester that was approaching and decided on some pampering and girl time at the salon. I was amused by the girls. Their conversations were amusing to me and it struck me that just a few short years ago, or at least what seems like a few short years, I was just like them. But now that seems foreign to me.

While I was musing over the college girls, the elderly husband walked back to where his wife was wrapping up her manicure. She seemed to be mildly distressed about something, which turned my attention back to them. Her husband reassured her that everything was alright, thanked the manicurist for the job he had done, and began to wheel her away from the lower table and back towards the front of the salon to pay. I was in line in front of them and saw while I was walking away that the wife's nails had a fresh coat of polish in a pretty shade of red. It took all I had to keep from crying while watching their exchanges and the way their love and care for one another was so evident. I was much more interested in the elderly couple than I was the 12 college students with their somewhat shallow choice in movies. At this point in my life, I identify more with a couple who are clearly living out the marriage vows of "for better or worse, in sickness and in health" that I myself promised only 5 months ago. I thought, as I walked out of the shop and stole one last surreptitious glance at the couple, that I certainly hoped Watson would be patient and caring enough to take me for manicures when we are older if that would make me happy and help me to feel more normal. And tonight he agreed to, as long as he gets to bring a newspaper to read. I assured him he could!

Rebranding - I'm In Print!

Today is December 1st and the beginning of Advent. I am excited to say that I was able to write an entry in the Advent devotional that our church organized and printed this year. Being able to see something that I've written in print, physically hold it in my hands, and share it with others is a really good feeling! I've been so thankful for the opportunities I've had this year to write for the church's blog and the Advent devotional. My love of writing has returned full force and I am looking for even more ways to utilize it and express myself through words.

I'm also very much looking forward to beginning the Advent devotional this evening. I thumbed through the book when Watson brought it home, to see where my entry had been placed, but I tried to be careful not to read any of the other entries from church leaders and fellow church members. I didn't want to spoil anything! I want to be able to read the entries each day and see the writers' thoughts about the anticipation of the Advent season unfold. In the hustle and bustle of this time of year that we often allow ourselves to get wrapped up in, I'm happily anticipating spending time each day in God's word and reflecting on encouraging messages from friends.

Rebranding - In Defense of Thanksgiving

Well, I did it. I broke my rule about no Christmas decorations going up until after Thanksgiving Day. In my defense, this was really more of a practical decision. My sweet husband is going along with my crazy plan to have not one but two Christmas trees this year. For the past few years, I have had a white tree with ornaments in funky blues, pinks, oranges, purples, and greens. And I love it! But my more traditional better half wasn't as big of a fan. So we have compromised with a gorgeous green tree in our front living room and my white tree will go up shortly in our den. So that we could get both trees up while I'm home this week for Thanksgiving break, getting the green tree set up and decorated early was really the only way to accomplish this. But I do feel bad.

I feel bad because, in a lot of ways, Thanksgiving Day is like the red headed stepchild of holidays. I ran into WalMart on November 1 to pick up some things for supper only to be greeted by a giant Christmas tree in the front door. A week or so before, I had stopped by Dollar General to buy a "Happy Halloween" door mat I had seen earlier. To find it again, I had to pick my way past the Christmas decorations and gift suggestions that were already proudly out on display! I am not a grinch nor am I a curmudgeon. I love Christmas as much as the next person. But I feel like Thanksgiving is just so under appreciated because it lacks the flash and pizazz that marketers and stores look for to convince us we want or need things. The only reason some have latched on to it is to offer good shopping deals a day earlier than usual, forcing people who ordinarily would not have to work to do so.

Maybe Thanksgiving is such an important holiday precisely because of its lack of pomp. It is simple, uncomplicated. Thanksgiving, at its heart, is a holiday about reflection, appreciation, family, and friends. Yes, we get to enjoy some delicious foods we only get at certain times of the year. And there can be stress involved, for sure, as there are with so many things when expectations get in the way. But, truly, Thanksgiving doesn't require the gifts, the trappings, the decorations that we sometimes get caught up with for other holidays. It just asks for a grateful heart and a reflective mind to look back over the previous year and assess all of the things for which we have to be truly Thankful. In that spirit, Happy Thanksgiving! And I promise not to decorate any more until Friday!

Rebranding - Soup Is Good for the Soul

Happy Thanksgiving Week! I am enjoying a much anticipated week long break from school and am looking forward to visiting with family and friends during this down time. I hope that you can say the same! Part of my original plans for this week included putting up our Christmas tree, decorating for Christmas, grading some papers, cleaning the house, writing a little, and cooking - lots of cooking! But my plans have gotten changed a little. Last week I got the opportunity to go with three of my greatest friends to see Dolly Parton. The one and only Dolly Parton! I jumped at the chance and, I must say, Dolly was fantastic! I loved getting to hear her iconic songs and her funny stories live. As a side note, Dolly is now my hero and I want to be her when I grow up. First step....bigger hair.

In addition to the amazing time I had seeing Dolly with two of my best girls, I also got food poisoning. Definitely not how I wanted to spend my trip seeing Dolly or the first of my Thanksgiving break. But I can say that God provides in all seasons and I was blessed even in this. Being sick away from home is one of my biggest fears. Getting sick is bad enough but to not have the comfort and familiarity of home makes it doubly worse. Fortunately, I had two registered dieticians and a doctor to take care of me on the trip home. And my best friend Melanie, one of the dieticians, works at a surgical weight loss clinic so she understands the unique things that I face as a Gastric Sleeve patient. Because of my surgery, there are certain medications I can't take and there is an extra concern of me getting dehydrated. After I told them I was sick, they put me back to bed and later on I woke up to Powerade Zero, stomach medicine I knew I could take, and sweet friends who had gotten me blankets and even brought me toast from the breakfast buffet. They were definitely my helpers in my time of need!

After several days of bumming it on the couch and Watson doing a wonderful job of taking care of me here at home, I can now say I think I've "turned the corner" and am finally feeling better. I am back on my way to cleaning, decorating, and cooking! My first thing to make today was some of my grandmother's vegetable soup, or Butler Stew as it is known in our family and to my friends. It is really just a basic vegetable soup recipe and it is definitely not thick enough to truly be considered a stew but it is delicious all the same. The first cold weekend of the Fall, my mom would make some Butler Stew and I would get to invite my two best friends over to share it with us. There wasn't much arm twisting or convincing required! Usually their parents would end up coming along too and we would have soup, cornbread, crackers, and great conversation. Another of our fun traditions was for my Mom to cook Butler Stew the night of the Baldwyn Christmas parade. We would go stand in the cold, shivering as we waited for candy and to wave to the people we knew riding by in cars or walking with bands or cheerleading squads. Then we'd come home and thaw out with the delicious soup. So many good memories!

This soup has been simmering all afternoon and the aroma of it has filled my house and my mind with memories. The smells of home grown canned tomatoes, ground beef, corn, potatoes, green beans, carrots, and lima beans warming and mingling together are like a kind embrace enveloping me. Add to that the unmistakable smell of fresh cornbread in the oven and I have been in heaven! The act of getting up and preparing this soup has done wonders in helping me feel better and more "normal" again. That's why I think soup is good for the soul. There's just something so comforting about a nice warm bowl of soup. After all the ugliness and bitterness we've seen the past few weeks in our country, I just want to give everybody a bowl of soup and say, "Here, have a seat, grab a spoon, feel some comfort, and let's talk it out." If only it could be solved that way. Here's to warm houses, warm hearts, and warm soup that's good for the soul.

Rebranding - Be a Bird

I wrote this blog post back in September for the blog at mine and Watson's church, Westminster Presbyterian, and wanted to share it here. I hope it encourages someone else going through a tough time of change and adjustment and "new"! 

“He will cover you with His feathers and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.”

Psalm 91:4 NIV

 

We often speak about our lives in terms of seasons, and much as the summer is shifting into fall, my life is in a “season” of change as well. When I was younger, I was not a fan of change. I didn’t like the idea of things being different from how they were, or of people leaving, or roles shifting. As I’ve grown, both as a person and in my faith, I’ve come to see change as an opportunity. An opportunity for growth, new experiences, an exciting adventure and challenge. Most days I feel that way. Most days.

There are days, however, where “exciting,” “adventure,” and “opportunity” would not be the adjectives I would choose to describe change. There are days where “overwhelming”, “intimidating”, and even “fearful” become the words I use to describe all of the change coming my way. Instead of a new town with new possibilities, it’s a place two hours from “home” without the people and places familiar to me. Rather than an opportunity to reach new kids and teach them, it’s my third new school in four years and the largest one I’ve ever taught at. I’ve come to realize that the days I choose those words and those perspectives are the days where I am relying on myself and my abilities and not my Heavenly Father who has led me to the change in the first place. This was illustrated to me the other day by, of all things, a bird.

           

My current season of change includes a 45-minute commute from Greenwood to Grenada where I teach high school English. I spend most mornings in my car listening to satellite radio, viewing the landscape as it rolls by, and gearing up for my day in the classroom. A few weeks ago, I noticed a pool of water off to my left beside the highway. I’ve seen the pool before but on this particular day a flash of white out of the corner of my eye caught my attention. I glanced to my left in time to see what looked to be over a hundred cranes flocked into the small pool. It was beautiful! The white wings and bodies packed into this tiny pool, flitting and dipping from side to side. It looked like those birds were having a grand time, splashing in the morning sun. The sight put a smile on my face as I thought about how beautiful God’s creations are!

As the smaller pool faded out of sight behind me I came to the larger pool connected to it, separated by just a small line of trees. And there I saw my lesson. Sitting in the middle of the larger pool was a solitary white crane. The fact that it was sitting in the pool by itself struck me and I thought it looked sad. “Why doesn’t he just join all of the birds in the next pool?” I wondered. And then another thought popped into my head. “I know just how he feels.” As the thought rolled through my brain, it registered with surprise. “What?!?! How do I feel like this sad bird?!?!” I stewed over that thought for several days, examining it from all angles. Was I not happy? I don’t feel alone, do I? Is something wrong? Well, after much mulling and stewing and examination, I came to a few realizations. We all go through times where we feel unsettled, when it can feel like things are just “too much”. And it is perfectly ok to take a step back and sit in “the pool” by ourselves. Especially if that time alone is spent in prayer, studying the Bible, and seeking the Lord’s guidance to lead our steps. But we also need to remember that God has put pools beside us full of “birds” to help and support us. I thought of all of the “pools of birds” God has placed in my life right now, specifically for this season of change. When I married Watson, I not only got a wonderful husband to be my partner and helper but I gained a supportive extended family who have gone out of their way to make sure I felt welcomed and loved. The Westminster family has also greeted me with open arms and made me feel at home in a new church and a new town. The teachers who have invited me to lunch and helped me navigate a new school have also been put there for a purpose. So I close with this challenge to each of us. If you are feeling like the solitary bird in the pond, don’t forget to look for the birds God has placed in your life. Seek them out. And if you are one of the birds in the smaller pool, look around to see the single bird you can invite into your pool. Be a “bird” for someone else that God has placed in your path.